March 2016 - Page 2 of 3 - Malcolm Cowen's Pages

Tomorrow’s another decision day

Mar 202016

It’s 9:30 tomorrow morning that I see the surgeon to hear what they recommend. Our son is coming with us, I’m grateful for that.

I suppose I should be more apprehensive. After all I know that whatever they do, it will be painful, very painful. But I can’t go on like this. My weight is down to 87Kg, that’s 14 lbs lost in three weeks. It’s not serious yet, there are small victories and I am finding more foods that I can eat, but it is getting harder to swallow. I will agree to whatever they suggest. Continue reading »

Another Good Day

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Mar 192016

Went to a party at a friend’s house. I was a bit worried about could I eat any of their food.

I did pretty well. I managed gammon and salmon, both in small quantities, but several servings over about 30 minutes. The birthday cake icing did hurt, so I left it.

I’m intrigued by the salmon though. When I tried a similar dish at home it hurt very badly. I’ve no idea why the difference. Continue reading »

A small victory

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Mar 192016

It’s been a good day.

Midday I managed to eat a whole bacon rasher, and it didn’t hurt at all. I grilled it till it was cooked but not crisp, and it hardly hurt at all.

Then I ate three whole tea-spoonfuls of apple crumble. And tonight I had two helpings of mince with veg.

The secret is to avoid potatoes and bread, which seem to be lethal for some reason, and chew everything into small pieces before swallowing (sorry if that was too much information). Continue reading »

The day after

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Mar 182016

After writing last night’s blog I went to bed. Not so much physically tired as mentally or maybe emotionally.

I didn’t sleep though, I was too cold. Yet the house was warm and the duvet was warm, but I lay there frozen. Looking back it seems to me that I was in shock. Today Beryl tells me I am far less tense. I certainly feel less tense, although I do have a tendancy today to want to sit and stare at the fire instead of doing anything. But then it’s not every day you get told you are going to live. Continue reading »

An answer, and it looks hard, but good

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Mar 162016

Hi Noon was the PET scan. I got up at 6am and had breakfast (porrage) then fasted. They pumped radioactive glucose into me and made me lie down for an hour while it got taken up by my system, then put me through a huge scanner, a sort of giant 3D geiger counter.

The idea was to see if anywhere was taking up unusual amounts of glucose. The results will be available for the Friday meeting of all the oncologists when they review all the cases. Continue reading »

News at Last

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Mar 152016

Several things today

Morning post brought an MRI scan on Monday. It was ordered by a Dr F of Surgery on my liver
Then I got a phone call to go to Nuclear Medicine tomorrow for a CT scan on my liver.

I am assuming this means they have found something suspicious there, presumably a secondary. Continue reading »

No Phone Call (2)

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Mar 152016

That’s Monday over, and no phone call to tell me the results of last Monday’s scan. I’m finding this waiting very hard.

I looked at the guidelines for response times for cancer. I’m still within them, so I suppose I have no formal grounds for complaint. I just want to know the prognosis. Am I going to live or die? Sorry to be so blunt, but that’s how the question sits in my head all day. Continue reading »

That MacBeth moment

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Mar 142016

I’m living off whatever I can manage to eat that does not cause pain. The problem is I can see no rhyme or reason in the things I can eat.

Salmon, even diluted in soup was agony. Worse, it started about 5 minutes after eating, so I’d already eaten most of the helping. Continue reading »

It never rains but ….

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Mar 132016

Today was the local Community Association meeting. I’m the Treasurer. I still am, but we’ve organised a previous treasurer and an ex-councillor to stand by for when I’m incapacitated, so that’s another angle sorted.

When we got home we discovered that someone had got into our outhouse and stolen a bag of potatoes, a few half-full bottles of wine and most of the contents of the freezer. I’m baffled, it must have weighed a ton. It’s also a thundering nuisance and wil cost a bit to replace. Continue reading »

No phone call (1)

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Mar 112016

Friday night now, and no phone call. Yes I know perfectly well I’m being unreasonable in expecting one. Dr Y implied next week was a far more likely time.

But I don’t feel reasonable. I’m the one with a monster chewing away steadily at my insides, and I think about it every hour of every day. Continue reading »

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